March 5, 2002

Things are going very well. I've been writing and recording songs for other people as well as myself. I've also been working on two soundtracks. The first soundtrack is very beautiful and traditional with roughly 10 songs on it. The second soundtrack is very eclectic and complicated with 15 songs. I'm thankful to God that He has blessed me with those songs. I'm really enjoying them.

I'm also thinking about adding a couple remakes to the second soundtrack. It would give me a chance to remake songs that I've loved listening to for so long. One of the songs on the soundtrack is a duet. By God's grace, I wrote that song last week. I haven't offered the duet to anyone yet though. It's not about money or publicity.

Some people would jump at the chance to work with the most famous singers out right now, but that doesn't mean anything to me. I have to choose the right person for it and also someone that I really want to work with. That's more important to me. 

I'm also recording some new guitar tracks for a couple songs on my album. I started recording them at about 5:30 am this morning. I'm using a new guitar sound that isn't common on most records. It's a sound I've loved since I was about 10, but it wasn't featured on a lot of records. I'm not going to say what style it is yet, because I don't want anyone else using the idea before I do, but it's definitely giving the songs a really nice sound. Initially when I was writing the album, I thought about the guitar sound I'm referring to, then kind of shelved the idea in favor of other guitar styles. Then I remembered it again a few weeks ago and how much I love that sound and started ordering the parts to make that guitar.    

It's really wonderful to have a studio at home. I'm very thankful to God for it. It's great being able to write and record something from scratch and actually produce a final product, all in the same room. Even though I've had the studio for about a year now, I still haven't gotten used to the convenience of being able to do that. It really is something that I'm very grateful for. I've also been writing a book that's turning out really well.

Sometimes I forget how amazing the Internet really is. I received a letter from a multitalented musician in Russia named Mike. I've read about and studied music markets all over the world, but to actually hear from someone from another culture, that shares the same interests and faith is really special. That's what music is about. Not awards or platinum records, but about communicating with other people. God bless you Alex.

I read the Bible everyday and pray to God asking Him to help and protect people that mean a lot to me and some that I'm not exactly friends with either (haha, I just don't want to use the word enemy). By God's grace, I've seen wonderful changes in their lives. I encourage you to do the same. Prayer really changes things.

Some of you have gotten into trouble and I want to encourage you not to give up. It makes me think of the song "We fall down" by Donnie McClurkin. It's outstanding. I find myself humming that song often. It's just so moving. Sometimes you hear a song and you know God blessed that person with it. That's one of those songs. I also love his song "Stand."

I've learned a lot these past few weeks. The most valuable lesson I learned is about integrity. Not through my own experience, but through someone else's. It showed me first hand that integrity is something very important. I did know that before, but it was a vivid reminder. Integrity or lack thereof can alter the course of your life and affect other people as well. It's really amazing when you think about it.

March 6, 2002

It's 2:42 am and I'm getting ready to record. As I've said before I'm not a stage person. It's not stage fright or insecurity, I just like being in the audience more. When you rehearse you have to try to anticipate how the crowd will receive the show. It's really funny, when I don't try too hard and just relax, I do much better. When I don't think about it, I'm fine, but when I start thinking about exactly what I'm doing, whether it be singing, dancing or playing an instrument and the details of each note or lyric, that's when I'm not at my best.

It's the same in the studio when I'm recording as well. It's better to be natural and not think about it too much. It's something I noticed and found it to be true. Let's just say, I'm glad I realized this before I go out there.

Dancing and singing at the same time isn't so bad. I mention this because I noticed some singers complain about it affecting their vocals and it does to some extent, but Thank God, I'm doing okay so far. I want to incorporate that into the show because I enjoy it.

March 22, 2002

I've been awake since about 1:30 am working. It is now 6:03 am. I had a great day yesterday, got a lot of work done. I had to catch this place before it closed at 11:00 am and I got there at oh, about 10:59 am. Then I went to the bank, travel agency, the bookstore and a few other places to pick up some stuff I needed. It was such a beautiful day. It was hot and the sun was shining. Well, that's typical here and sometimes I fail to appreciate the weather cause it's the climate I was raised in, but yesterday was so beautiful I couldn't help but notice it.

My next appointment wasn't until in the afternoon, so I went over to Key Biscayne for a while. Again, it was so beautiful over there. The water was so blue, it was so relaxing. Just looking at the water brought to mind and made me appreciate the things God has created.

A tennis open was also going on over there and that made me think of when my dad tried to teach me how to play tennis when I was a kid. Aww he still has my racket from when I was 4...daddy let it go...when we go to Wimbledon, it will be as spectators.

My appointment in the afternoon went well, then I came home and got back to work. I was so tired when I got home because I only slept a few hours the evening before and stayed up recording all night.

I've been thinking about marriage a lot lately and I don't even have a boyfriend. Talk about putting the cart before the horse. But I know once I meet the right person for me, it won't take long. I would also like to get married in either London or Los Angeles. Guys hit on me all the time, but I haven't found the right person for me yet and I don't want to just date guys for the sake of dating. It's not right leading people on and lying to them by giving them the wrong impression and sometimes people get too attached and find it hard to let go.

I've also devoted so much time to work, that my personal life really wasn't a priority. The company is set up by God's grace, so now I hope to spend some time working on my personal life. God willing, if I have children when I get married, I think the names Christian, John or David would be great names for a boy and Anastasia, Rachel or Victoria would be great names for a girl.

I'm also getting everything together to move from Miami. I love it here and I love the people here, but it's time for me to move on. I've been thinking about a few places and I've been looking at real estate listings in each area to decide. It's not just about me, it's about the company as well and that I put before myself. As in everything though, I'm praying to God for direction.